Moderately Ridiculous

Chaotic. Interesting. Ridiculous. Awkward. Amusing. Confusing. Crazy-making. Beautiful.

This is my life.
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Alison: Apparently, since she doesn’t have insurance, we can’t eat her cake.
Pam: It’s cake.  What needs insurance?
Alison: Liability insurance.  In case someone dies from eating your cake?
Pam: We are far too litigious.
Alison: I know, it’s ridiculous.  We’re litigating cake.
Pam: TORTS!

Alison: Also, what is this weather??

Victoria: For some reason, I actually really like weather like this.  I like cool humidity.  I’m like a fern or something.

Alison: I GOT THE INTERVIEW!

Karin: YAY!!!!!! CONGRATS!!!!  ::parade::

Alison: Aw, a parade!

Karin: ::dances::

Alison: Ooh, a dancing parade!

Karin: ::confetti::

Alison: WHOA.

Karin:  Too much?

Alison: There is confetti EVERYWHERE.  Who is going to clean this up?

Karin: ::maintenance men::

"Almost Friday! Almost Friday!  This calls for a bagel!"  - Kristin

"I was cleaning my database; I have no time for workplace nudity," - Pam

Victoria: It’s kind of a weird thing, really.  I totally understand why recruiters exist, but I feel like I’m getting something for free, and it feels weird. Because I’m getting career advice and someone who will help me find a job… for free.

Me: What if it was your job to get other people jobs? That’s a weird job.  How very meta.

Victoria: What if a recruiter helped you get a job as a recruiter?

Me: Whoa.  Mind?  Blown.

Victoria: This is why we shouldn’t smoke pot.

Me: ARRA! I miss you.
Rachelle: I miss you, too!
Me: We are like ships passing in the night.
Rachelle: We’re more like raccoons on the internet…
Me: That sounds like a band name…

Fact: There’s nothing that happens early in the morning that wouldn’t be better or make more sense if instead it happened later in the morning.
Rachelle, of By The List fame

Friend: I was like, “It hurts when I pee and I’m itchy,” and they were like, that’s nice.
Me: Ugh, you need a new gynecologist.  These people are friggin’ incontinent.
Friend: LOL.
Me: Oh my God, I meant INCOMPETENT.  Your doctors aren’t peeing themselves.
Friend: Well… maybe they are…?

Note: SAS is a statistical analysis package that lots of people use to… analyze statistics.

Pam: At least you have SAS.
Alison: Yours still isn’t working?
Pam: Nope.  I ran out of things to do.
Alison: Well, I’ll be merging four databases tomorrow. With 300+ records each.
Pam: I’m so jealous.
Alison: Well, come online and help.  Since I will be having a meltdown.
Pam: I guess the SAS is always greener on the other side…